The Glenn Beck Report

Is it Earth or Planet of the Apes? Does God have the power necessary to help Glenn fix everything? Is George Soros going to sic MediaMatters on poor Glenn again? You can find out the answers to these questions and much more by reading Quinlan’s program breakdown linked below!

Click HERE to read the entire succinct dissection…

Glenn Beck Program – June 30th, 2010

Minute 0: Says that since Kagan doesn’t want to be labeled progressive, all progressives must be ashamed of themselves. Right.

Minute 1: “Hello America… sometimes I think you and I are the only ones”. So, what? There’s nobody in other countries? Try proper phrasing sometime.

Minute 1: Talking about how he doesn’t understand things in the news, or why people did the things that they did. Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me.

Minute 2: Says that after news, he’s often left yelling at speaker or commentator. It seems most things leave him yelling.

Minute 4: Using a mock British accent with a foolish character talking about how he was in France when he had the carbon footprint explained to him. Xenophobe extraordinaire.

Minute 5: He keeps misspeaking and correcting himself while looking straight ahead. This guy’s use of a teleprompter is painfully obvious. Obama’s problems my ass.

Minute 6: Talking about Obama taking a long time to accept foreign aid for the spill. Guess who didn’t use any aid at all for a national disaster: If you said G. W. Bush, go to the head of the class.

Minute 7: Talking about EPA not yet having approved a large cleanup vessel that is potentially very helpful. Guess what – some food still being reviewed by the FDA might be yummy, but it could be poisonous too. This is why these things need to be reviewed.

Minute 9: Talking about how Obama is avoiding bank taxes by ending TARP early. Huh- somehow, I think that he would love this move were it under a conservative president. Seriously, I thought he liked the whole ‘no tax’ thing. Hypocrite.

Minute 10: Mow he’s showing an old video where he calls TARP a useless slush fund. Again, he’s defeating his own argument and exposing his own hypocrisy. This man is a walking paradox.

Minute 15: Talking about Obama’s energy & climate legislation. He is baffled by a clear explanation. “with a bill that makes clean energy the profitable kind of energy for America’s businesses by putting a price on pollution”. Simple. You can profit with clean energy, because you’ll be charged otherwise. I don’t see the opportunity for confusion. But then again, Mr. Beck always finds something to be inexplicably confused about.

Minute 16: Talking about Eric Holder being in Afghanistan while we’re uncovering Russian spies. Somehow, I think that an illegal war with thousands and thousands of deaths is slightly more important than a few alleged non-violent spies.

Minute 17: Talking about one of the spies, who happened to be Marxist and said that America was cruel, and compared jails to slavery and Arizona’s law to Nazi legislation. Please. After all your Nazi comparisons, I hardly think you can call other people out on theirs.

Minute 18: Implies that Russians have already infiltrated policy-making circles. Just because liberals are smart doesn’t mean that they’re Russian.

Minute 20: Says that Obama wouldn’t meet with Israel after flotilla, but would meet with Russia after spies. GUESS WHAT SMARTY – IT WAS ISRAEL THAT CANCELED THAT MEETING.

Minute 20: Says that he’s used to Russians hating Americans. This anti-Russian thing seems to be a recurring theme with him.

Minute 25: Says that Kagan sends up enough red flags to have her own protest protest at the G-8/G-20. He’d say the same thing about anybody that supported Obama, so I really think we should take everything he says with a grain of salt.

Minute 25: Shows a clip of  Kagan (when asked if she was progressive) saying that her politics must be different from her judging. Hm… I guess he wants all of the Supreme Court judges to be religious fanatics.

Minute 26: Talking about liberals not wanting to be known as liberals, instead as progressives. Progress is a good thing, idiot. That’s why you’ll rarely see any conservative progressives. By the way, remember earlier in the program when he did just the opposite and said that Kagan didn’t want to be called progressive?

Minute 26: Implying that all rulings should be taken directly from the constitution. Do you have any idea how many special cases there are? If it were all up to the very old, very incomplete constituition, prison would be full of innocents, bad people would be free, not to even mention the smaller details.

Minute 26: Kagan hearings, questioner asks very pejoratively if the government can tell people what to eat every day. Kagan hesitates for a second before answering (he ends the clip before she answers), and Beck takes that to mean that she wants the government controlling everything we eat. That’s some inspired genius right there.

Minute 28: He says that the health care bill can tell you what to eat. That’s a lie, plain and simple.

Minute 29: Making a HUGE stretch to say that Kagan would ban books, and he doesn’t want somebody who would ban books in the court. Really? Somehow I think that were he in power, he’d be tossing all the liberal stuff out the window. Just look at religion’s colorful history in regards to banned books.

Minute 30: Says political speech should never and can never be banned. Actually, I think you’re wrong. Look at all the racist/homophobic/xenophobic stuff you’ve said on your political show. I think it constitutes hate speech. Thus, if deemed illegal, your political speeches could be outlawed.

Minute 35: Criticizes congressman Pete Stark (my personal favorite congressman, by the way, because of his atheism) for asking a minuteman “who he’s going to kill today”. Beck seems to think that all illegals are drug lords and kidnappers.

Minute 37: Says that because we closed off 80 miles along the Arizona border, we’re giving up our sovereignty. I have no idea how that makes sense. The area was simply closed to the public due to safety concerns – the whole “giving it back to Mexico” thing is a blatant lie.

Minute 37: Says that hiring an illegal is modern day slavery. I’m not sure how that works.

Minute 40: Standing up and flailing his arms around. This is entertainment, pure and simple (Oh, and for the record – fair and balanced, my ass).

Minute 40: Now he’s talking about how shameful it is for a congressman to mock his
constituent. Funny seeing how often he mocks his viewers.

Minute 43: He says that we deserve the terrible government that we have. Probably because of people like you. Also, it amuses me how these people constantly forget that their least favorite politicians were VOTED in by popular vote (and that their favorite wasn’t). The sad ones are the minority.

Minute 54: Says that America is with the border patrol agents – he just showed multiple people decrying them. He really needs to understand that he and his viewers do not constitute an entire crazy little country.

Minute 54: Implying that socialists are against the police. As a socialist myself, I am extremely thankful to the police and would like them expanded. I think it’s obvious that Beck and his supporters want the opposite. I’d also like to point out that the police are a socialized service.

Minute 55: He says that people don’t distrust the government, they distrust the people in it. What’s the difference? I’m also sure that’s what the Teabaggers are crying when they march against “big government”.

Minute 59: Again, airtime for his book! He can just never resist the opportunity to make a buck.

Wexler sez…
Thanks for another great redux, Qu1n1an.

Watching Beck is like wading into the Gulf with no HazMat equipment. I just want to help clear a couple of things up.

Beck and the rest of his fellow news monkeys at Faux keep repeating the meme about “Obama wouldn’t accept foreign aid” like it’s some kind of demented mantra that will somehow become true if they keep saying it long enough and loud enough. The facts are not with them on this point. National Incident Commander, Adm. Thad Allen, has stated that there are (and have been) 15 foreign-flagged vessels operating in the Gulf and that the controversy over the “Jones Act” is unfounded. None of the ships granted or denied access to the response effort have been done so because of the Jones Act or a waiver of the Act. So why does Faux/Beck keep repeating it? Because our idiotic, lazy press, led around by their noses, will keep repeating each others’ inaccuracies rather than even stop surfing the porn long enough to Google the facts.

On a personal note, I find it amusing that Beck is trying to re-freeze the Cold War and maybe even heat it up with a few Patriot missile bases. Hating the Russians is a pathological defect of Mormons, who caught the mental disease from their big-shot Cleon Skousen, a paranoid schizo who saw a commie behind every bush. (If you know nothing about the John Birch Society, you ought to do some research so you can get a feel for what the 1950s was like for those of us who grew up then.) Glenn Beck did the Forward for a re-issue of Skousen’s “5000 Year Leap“, a tome that is a theological, logical, and truth-free shipwreck of falsehoods, false reasoning, and false paradigms. This monstrous lie contained between 2 covers is an attempt to prove that God designed the United States of America through creation of the Israelite state. Whoo, what a mess he makes in his intellectual pants. Of course, this book has become key material in the right’s fight to prove that the US is a Christian Nation.

Beck’s point that political speech can’t and shouldn’t be banned is a touchy one. If your goal is to overthrow the US government as a backup plan to losing elections, then your political speech crosses the line into sedition. I believe that the tone of Glenn Beck is obviously and demonstrably seditious and will attempt to prove that his content is as well elsewhere on this site.

Hi everyone – this is my first post on the main page of the site. I’m very excited to be contributing over here, and hopefully I can help to bring the site to its full potential. Anyway, today I’ll be posting the first entry in what I hope will become a regular fixture on the site – The Glenn Beck Program Breakdown. In this feature, I will review an entire episode of the Glenn Beck Program, and call him out on his crap minute-by-minute. Note however, that there’s simply too much BS in every episode for me to note it all, so without further ado, let’s begin!

Glenn Beck Program – June 29th, 2010

Minute 0: Accuses the entire New York Times staff of being communists. The media only has a liberal bias, Glenn, because truth has a liberal bias as well.

Minute 1: Talks about the money that Canadian taxpayers are spending on the G-20 summit. Oh, so now Beck cares about Canada! And here I was thinking that he hated it, and its commie health care system.

Minute 2: He’s showing a hand-drawn chart displaying various countries’ GDP per capita. IT’S ERRONEOUS. You’re full of crap Beck. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_GDP_%28PPP%29_per_capita

Minute 7: Just listen to him, going on about the rich keeping their money. He never mentions the poor. He clearly doesn’t care about the lower class.

Minute 8: “America, I don’t think you’re stupid. But when a guy gets into a ‘scissors’ lift…” He repeats the term again at 10 minutes.

Minute 8: He’s going to make a solemn swear – and he puts his left hand up to his right side. Oops.

Minute 9: Discussing a phony timeline that he’s made, says “before Christ”. You can’t bring religion into news. This is entertainment, plain and simple. Religion is just another lie anyway.

Minute 12: “This guy in Cambodia… this general area.” He’s unable to pinpoint Cambodia on the globe – he’s not even in the right region.

Minute 12: He’s talking in a mock Russian accent now, clearly intending to be an “evil” character. What’s the purpose of this? Does he realize that the Cold War ended 20 years ago? Xenophobe.

Minute 14: Now he’s talking about Obama wanting to stop drilling for oil. Beck says we should continue to drill, and keep it all for ourselves. Well, yeah, keeping it all four ourselves is the only way that we’ll have enough to last a significant amount of time.

Note: There’s a long break here in which Beck goes in circles, repeating points that he made before.

Minute 25: He’s making an argument that government spending doesn’t work – and, oh, he just lost his own argument. He demonstrates that after WWII, after all the big spending, everything was relatively fine. Unintentionally beating down his own argument, the fool.

Again with the circles. This is how he fills his time apart from lying.

Minute 44: Oh! What do you know. He’s touting his new book in the middle of the show. This is a fiction book by the way. He’s not even using it for excerpts, he’s just giving it airtime.

Minute 45: Talking about the protests at the G-8/G-20 by people wanting to end capitalism. He calls them anarchists despite visual signs advocating communism and socialism. He also displays quotes calling these people servants of the community. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t like them.

Minute 46: He’s referring to that story where Mao was on an ornament on the white house Xmas tree. No, Obama did not put that there – they got community groups to decorate the tree. But I’m sure Beck knows that.

Minute 52: Oop, now he’s slandering the late Senator Robert Byrd. Leave it Beck to disparage the dead.

Minute 53: Talking about Byrd’s former KKK affiliation (which he apologised for on multiple occasions). Really Glenn? Somehow I think that you would have been first in line behind him. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0tgvWxC_6A

Minute 59: “White people of America: Warning! you’re going to learn stuff about our country that you didn’t know, but you need to see it. African-Americans: I warn you – you’re gonna find heroes, American heroes, that for some reason have been erased.” I like how he narrows the whole thing down to these two races. Any Korean or Spanish viewers can just forget about it.

Well, there you have it! Hope you enjoyed it, or at least learned a little something about the brilliance that is Glenn Beck. Look forward to more in the future!

Wexler sez….

Thank you for the EXCELLENT work on deconstructing Beck’s program. What patience! Amazing!

Sorry about putting up the Michael Moore picture. I take full responsibility for it, feel free to take it down!